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So Much Love, Just Enough Time


By Kellie Clark


My little girl started 5th grade this week. It is her last year of elementary school, as she will begin junior high next year. With a mixture of pride and melancholy, I hugged her goodbye and walked her to the bus; after all, it is no longer “cool” to have Mom bring you to school on the first day!


As I drove to work that morning, a poignant memory replayed in my mind, as if I was watching a movie of my little Savanna’s life. Shortly after she was born, during my maternity leave, I was grocery shopping with my tiny newborn daughter cuddled snuggly in a sling across my torso. As I pushed the shopping cart down an aisle, feeling my warm baby curled up next to my heart, I noticed a very elderly woman in a wheelchair being pushed by her nurse. Like a lightning bolt, I had a new mother’s moment of reality strike me! I thought to myself, as I saw the nurse selecting items from the shelf at the request of the woman she tended, one day, my little Savanna will be an old woman – perhaps in a wheelchair that needs pushing – and I will not be the one pushing it for her. Tears streaming down my cheeks, the truth of a human lifetime looked so different to me through the eyes of motherhood.


She is only mine for a few short years. My baby became a little girl, and she is now big girl blossoming into a young lady. She will soon be a flowering teenager, on her way to adulthood. My grown up girl will transition through middle life into her golden years. Along the way, she will shed tears of joy so fulfilling her heart will explode, and she will weep with heartbreak that feels unmendable. With God’s grace, I will be the one who is privileged to wipe many of those tears, both happy and sad. As I the age and eventually move to a new home in Heaven, I will leave my little Savanna in God’s capable hands, trusting that He will provide the perfect loved one to push her wheelchair, someday.


Children are the most perfect blessing and cherished gift. The only treasure more precious is the time we are given on earth to enjoy them. These thoughts might bring tears to my eyes; however, my heart rejoices each time I remember that moment in the grocery aisle because the memory is a powerful reminder to slow down and savor every moment of little Savanna’s life.


Motherhood is the gift of so much love, and just enough time to share it.

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